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Category: Best of the LPB

The Universe is just shiny stuff, created to distract us from our actual purpose.

What can a star that exploded three hundred million years ago possibly tell you about the magic in a beloved’s kiss?

If Robert steals Alice‘s
identity,
and Alice finds out
and asphyxiates he,
when the police arrive
they will have to decide:
charge her with murder,
or just suicide?

Honestly,
I don’t think
there’s any aspect
of the illegal immigration
problem
that can’t be solved
with a big
honkin’
catapult.

I thought I had found a new twist to let me cash in on the success of FaceBook, MySpace, and the like: I started an _anti_-social networking site.

So far, no one has signed up. Success!

When you go to sleep each night, and you wake up the next morning, how do you *know* it’s the same world you left??

Despite all your careful planning,
despite all the tedious rehearsal,
at the core of it all
     life
is improv.

I was listening to Mike Huckabee on the radio the other day, and was struck once again with his clarity of focus and his dedication to rebuilding the American dream.

If the Republican party had nominated him as their choice for President, he’d have cleaned the Democrat’s clock. Instead our country is on the way to becoming an Obama nation.